Three Common Myths About Therapy

Therapy has long been a subject of curiosity and misconception. In this blog, we aim to debunk three common myths surrounding therapy and shed light on what it truly entails. So, let’s address these myths one by one.

Myth No. 1 – Therapy is a way to fix broken people 

Therapy can often be viewed as a tool,  method, or strategy to fix perceived brokenness in people. 

What therapy actually is: 

A way to help us see that we are not broken, a process that encourages us to let go of the societal and self-imposed expectations we have taken on and rediscover our authentic selves.Through therapeutic guidance, we can recognise the ways we navigate the world  and distinguish between what we have taken on that is not really ours and what belongs to us. Therapy helps us to reconnect with our true essence, allowing personal growth and to make space for the expression of previously unwelcome or unidentified aspects, skills, characteristics, values, and ideas we hold. This allows us to flourish.

Rachel Naomi Remen’s insight speaks to this transformative nature of therapy:

“Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn’t you – all of the expectations, all of the beliefs – and becoming who you are.”  

Myth No. 2 – Therapy is for people who are not strong or smart enough to work out their own problems 

This is based on the premise we should be able to do everything ourselves and that needing others is a failing or weakness, and that therapy is there to help people who are not independent or strong enough.

Who therapy is actually for: 

Everyone and anyone. There is a notion predominant in Western society that it’s not normal or OK to need others. This can lead to a disconnection between each other. In our quest for, and desire to prove our independence, the outcome often results in a loss of sense of self or a distorted view of who we are.

The value of therapy is how it can help us become the best versions of ourselves. To recognise that our strength and humanity is found in who and how we are, as we live and grow in relationship and community.

Myth No. 3 – Therapy gives direct solutions to help us ‘get better’ and resolve our ‘problems’ 

This presumes there is something wrong with us and getting better means we can solve what is wrong with us. Often what can be perceived as ‘problems’ are simply situations, emotions, or states that are part of life and humanity. Often what we see to be a sign of being unwell is our body and mind’s way of responding to difficult or traumatic experiences that are not serving us as well as it once did.

What therapy actually does: 

Therapy supports us to find a way through life’s challenges.It equips us with tools to navigate the paradoxes in life and in ourselves and to find more balance within ourselves. Rather than seeking absolute solutions, therapy helps us embrace the complexities of our emotions and relationships, fostering resilience and adaptability.

As Esther Perel says, “Much of life’s challenges are not problems we solve but paradoxes we manage.” 

Therapy helps us to embrace the intricate and often contradictory nature of human existence rather than to fight or try and ‘fix’ or ‘solve’ it. It gives us an opportunity to see things from perspectives that were not accessible to us without support. It’s a process of uncovering layers of emotions and experiences that contribute to our well-being. It serves as a safe space for us to explore these feelings, understand their roots, and find healthier ways to address them. 

Therapy is a powerful path to personal growth and healing the wounded or hurting parts of us. It guides us through the labyrinth of our emotions, enabling us to release what no longer serves us and embrace who we are. It assists us in managing life’s paradoxes, rather than solving all its problems, and empowers us to greater self-acceptance, paving the way for a brighter and more authentic future.

Therapy is about becoming who we truly are… about holding the knowing, and experiencing the truth of our inherent worth and goodness.

Written by Lisa Barrett